Hey guys its Eleanora and I haven't post lately, i'm sincerely sorry but I've been going trough a lot and guess what ? I'm here today to share it with you guys :3
So what happened is that Dani went to see the school councillor to talk to her about my issues, they called my parents and i was really anxious about their reaction.
So somehow my mom doesn't know anything about self-harm, and seh was really worried. The first night she didn't slept, she cried. She wouldn't let me lock myself to take a shower, and at first she didn't want to leave my room when I had to sleep.
I asked her if she was disappointed and she answered "We are like turtles, we have a shell. But sometimes the shell breaks, and some people find it easy to hide more than others".
Update soon guys,
Love ♥
Eleanora :3
Showing posts with label eating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label eating. Show all posts
Thursday, 13 November 2014
Saturday, 4 October 2014
My Story
Hello lovelies !
Since Dani posted an article about getting help and about her story, I guess it is my turn now to share mine.
I have had always, as far as I remember, issues with my weight.
I remember when I was 8, making plans of how I will eat in middle school.
When I was ten, I did not want to reach 30kg.
When I was 11,I made diet plans after a class trip (of not eating so well).
At 12, I was reading the calories labels behind the granola bar my mom gived me as snacks for school.
And so on...
Last year, after the Christmas holiday, I went to synchronised swimming class for the first time since 3 weeks. The teacher (who I didn't appreciate that much) asked me to walk infront of her. After completing the task, I asked her why. She said "You gained some weight during the holiday,look at your thighs". I remember this moment like if it was yesterday, I couldnt breathe, I was about to cry ; she smiled and said "You could go run before class on the stadium next to the swimming pool". It was the first time in my life, that anyone had ever called me fat.Or made a comment on my body.
The fact that she was an adult, and my coach, made the situation even worse.
Since this day, everything changed.
I weighted 42kg for 1m53 that day.
Three months later, I weighted 36.5 kg.
I had droped almost 7 kgs.
What did I do ? Well lets say that my diet went worse and worse days after days and weeks after weeks.
I went from a complete breakfast (cornflakes,milk,orange juice) to a cup a coffee. I signed up for some sport competition with some training at lunch time at my school, and every time I came back after training to the cafeteria ; no food was ever left except salad.When I came back from school, I was always extremely hungry (with only a cup of coffee and a small portion of salad in the stomach) and I will go for a 1h run. Then, I would eat "normaly" at dinner so my parents don't suspect anything.
Wrong.
My parents saw my weight loss, the teachers told my mom that I looked weak and that I had a noticabe weight loss. So my mom took me to see a doctor. He asked me about my weight and my mom answered 38kgs, she didn't knew my real weight. He explained how seriously I could damage my own body and that my body was beautiful healthily. Until this day, I still think that he didn't took my problem seriously.
Then, my american penpal came for 10 days and I didn't want her to think that I was a "skinny b*tch" who talks about her weight and food all the time. So while she was here, I ate normaly and didn't mention my issues with food. And then,I thinked about it alot and felt like eating normaly again, for my own good health.
But still today, I have issues with food,weight and body image(and more but this would be in an other article).
If like me, you need help, please contact a doctor or call a hotline immidiatly.
Don't damage your body and mind,
Stay strong ,beautiful ♥
-Eleanora ♥
Since Dani posted an article about getting help and about her story, I guess it is my turn now to share mine.
I have had always, as far as I remember, issues with my weight.
I remember when I was 8, making plans of how I will eat in middle school.
When I was ten, I did not want to reach 30kg.
When I was 11,I made diet plans after a class trip (of not eating so well).
At 12, I was reading the calories labels behind the granola bar my mom gived me as snacks for school.
And so on...
Last year, after the Christmas holiday, I went to synchronised swimming class for the first time since 3 weeks. The teacher (who I didn't appreciate that much) asked me to walk infront of her. After completing the task, I asked her why. She said "You gained some weight during the holiday,look at your thighs". I remember this moment like if it was yesterday, I couldnt breathe, I was about to cry ; she smiled and said "You could go run before class on the stadium next to the swimming pool". It was the first time in my life, that anyone had ever called me fat.Or made a comment on my body.
The fact that she was an adult, and my coach, made the situation even worse.
Since this day, everything changed.
I weighted 42kg for 1m53 that day.
Three months later, I weighted 36.5 kg.
I had droped almost 7 kgs.
What did I do ? Well lets say that my diet went worse and worse days after days and weeks after weeks.
I went from a complete breakfast (cornflakes,milk,orange juice) to a cup a coffee. I signed up for some sport competition with some training at lunch time at my school, and every time I came back after training to the cafeteria ; no food was ever left except salad.When I came back from school, I was always extremely hungry (with only a cup of coffee and a small portion of salad in the stomach) and I will go for a 1h run. Then, I would eat "normaly" at dinner so my parents don't suspect anything.
Wrong.
My parents saw my weight loss, the teachers told my mom that I looked weak and that I had a noticabe weight loss. So my mom took me to see a doctor. He asked me about my weight and my mom answered 38kgs, she didn't knew my real weight. He explained how seriously I could damage my own body and that my body was beautiful healthily. Until this day, I still think that he didn't took my problem seriously.
Then, my american penpal came for 10 days and I didn't want her to think that I was a "skinny b*tch" who talks about her weight and food all the time. So while she was here, I ate normaly and didn't mention my issues with food. And then,I thinked about it alot and felt like eating normaly again, for my own good health.
But still today, I have issues with food,weight and body image(and more but this would be in an other article).
If like me, you need help, please contact a doctor or call a hotline immidiatly.
Don't damage your body and mind,
Stay strong ,beautiful ♥
-Eleanora ♥
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